Are you feeling defeated, broken, and crushed by life?  Does it seem like the Lord is far away and evil is near?  Are you asking the same questions David did in Psalm 10 – “Why do you stand so far off as though you don’t care?  Why have you hidden yourself when I need you the most?”

Many that I talk to are being crushed to their core – loss of loved ones, loss of health, financial security, housing losses, and much more. 

Three months ago, I became very sick.  Then I contacted Covid which quickly diminished my ability to breath.  I was given a 5% chance of survival and was life flighted to a major hospital in my state.  I spent several days on a ventilator and a total 18 days in the hospital.  During this time, I lost muscle mass, the physical ability to lift my arms or walk, and did not eat for several weeks. 

I, like many of you, did not understand why I was/am going through such intense crushing.  I too asked the Lord the very questions that David did during his time of oppression. (Psalm 10) And then I remembered that Jesus was also crushed to the point of death for me and then resurrected so that I too could have life.  My despair turned into gratefulness for all that he has done for me.  I am overwhelmed by his love.  My heart bursts wide open in appreciation and thankfulness for being alive, being able to see my children and grandchildren, and for the love of many who warred spiritually for me.  I came back to my first love.

When I don’t understand, I always go to the Lord for insight.  I asked the whys and he revealed to me that a crushing spirit is globally over the world right now.  Its intent is to destroy and kill as many as it can. 

When I was in the ICU, I was unable to move my body.  As I came out of the sedation, I could hear, see, and at times make sounds.  The Lord opened these senses to help me understand what was going on in the room.  On my right behind my head was a large warring angel that was in charge of my recovery.  All around the room near the ceiling a host of angels waiting for their command from this warring angel.  Just so you know, I have seen angels for years and believe they are messengers from God to do his bidding.  The warring angel would place his large hand under my head, lean down by my ear and whisper, “Fight, Lois, fight for it is not your time.”  Then he would direct two angels at a time to work on various parts of my body.  He reiterated the same message to them and said, “She has more work for the Kingdom to do.”  Suddenly, a loud sound ascended throughout the room as these angels began whirling in movement and excitement. This movement was taking place during the time I was critical.  It was the sound of war, of victory, and praise.  (Revelation 5:11 – “Then I looked and heard the voice of many angels, numbering thousands upon thousands, and ten thousand times ten thousand.”)

The warring angel began directing the doctor and nurses as they worked on me.  It is my understanding that their first attempt to put a chest tube in was placed wrong.  I noticed the warring angel, redirect the doctor’s hands and when the chest tube was placed correctly, there occurred a large swishing sound of air being removed from around my lungs.  I immediately went from 100% dependency on the ventilator to 50%.  Due to an air pocket being punctured, my lung collapsed.   But because they corrected the position of the chest tube, my critical situation turned around and I began to recover.

During this time, I had no ability to pray.  I felt lost and alone.  After receiving the message to fight, I realized that the Lord was fighting for me.  I discovered later that a heralding cry had gone out from my daughter to enlist people to war from me as well.  Gretchen became vigilant as she warred for my life. While I was in a sedated state, many of these warriors from family and close friends to those who I consider my tribe from around the world would enter my ICU room through zoom and pray for me.    They spoke words of life over me and prophesied healing and great things for my future.  My spirit became ignited.

I knew something was happening on the inside but I could not explain it.  The Lord opened my eyes again to see what was taking place.  My body was full of arrows that ranged from small to extremely large ones.  This revealed the strategic method of the enemy trying to destroy me.  The largest arrow was like a shadow in my chest.  It was meant to take my breath away which would cause my death. The Lord told me that it was thrust with such a force that it became only a shadow and hopefully undetected through the many ex-rays I had.  In two hospitals, the shadow was there but not addressed.  The warring angel directed the doctor so that it could be disclosed. 

What I was feeling on my inside was the removal of arrows.  Two angels would come at a time, remove some of the arrows and then suddenly I would be able to do things I had not been able to do previously.  I watched as the angels would ascend back to the ceiling, applauding and cheering my accomplishments, swirling with excitement for my healing.

Perhaps the strangest of their cheering occurred after I made a sharp, shrill sound.  This sound would emanate from me after a time of coughing.  I watched as the entire host of angels swirled, clapped, and became so excited.  I again asked the Lord for understanding.  The Lord revealed that this sound was cutting through the enemy’s tactics in the second heaven.  Sound is a weapon that the Lord gives us.  It includes the words we speak, our declarations and decrees, and our trust that God can do all things. 

Sound was significant when crashing down the walls of Jericho.  Psalms 18 (13-14) speaks of God’s thunderous voice scattering the enemy. It continues to tell us how “he reached down from on high and took hold of me and drew me out of deep waters.  He rescued me from my powerful enemy, from my foes, who were too strong for me.  They confronted me in the day of my disaster, but the Lord was my support.  He brought me out into a spacious place.”

Psalm 76:3; 6 tells us how he ‘smashes every weapon of war that comes against him.  That’s where he uses the broken arrows as kindling for his mighty bonfire.”  “When Jacob’s God reared his rebuke, soldiers and their steeds all fell to the ground stunned and lying still.”

Suddenlies continued to occur.  I suddenly was able to sit up.  I suddenly was strong enough to reach for the chair, move to it on my own, lift my hands above my head, lift a fork to eat, swallow without choking, and eventually take care of some of my own needs.  What was written in my chart and what I was able to do did not make sense to doctors and nurses.  I recall getting so excited whenever this happened because I knew the Lord was doing a work inside of me. 

My doctor wanted me to go to acute rehabilitation after my quarantine was up. I was accepted initially due to my lack of physical ability but then another suddenly happened.  I began to be able to walk to the bathroom with a walker without assistance.  The administrator of the rehabilitation hospital happened to be in the room when I came out.  Noticing my ability to walk with a walker and take care of my own needs in the bathroom, she informed me that I no longer qualified.  I was too high functioning for their program.  She felt I could go home and immediately set it in motion.  Interestingly, earlier that morning I had a strong urge to get dressed.  I found my clothes on my own, was able to wash up and dress myself without help. I just knew I would be going home that day. 

We must not get stuck in the crushing as God is fighting for us behind the scenes.  It is crucial that we trust him during our time of being attacked, physically ill, financial losses, along with every situation that is causing despair in our live.  Crushing place is not our final destination.  God’s promises are!  Move through the crushing.  Watch God give you suddenlies, healing, and restoration.  

Listen to the full message on my podcast, A New Level Awaits You!, on Charisma podcast network or on my new Youtube Channel, Lois Flewelling.